The Line.

There’s this invisible line somewhere on our lives that changes everything. It can be a wide line–a thick boundary like the Mississippi River–or as undetectable as a precinct line. But it’s there. There’s this invisible line and you usually don’t even know you’ve crossed it until you’re well over on to the other side.

I don’t know where I am. I do, but I don’t. It’s like I’m wading in a murky river, toeing the line or straddling it. I can still see both sides very clearly,  but I have this pressing feeling one side will soon be farther than the other.

It’s like this: you’re a kid and you enjoy friday movie nights at home with your family. Then you reach a certain age and staying home on a Friday is the last thing you want to do. Then you’re to the point where you can’t remember the last friday night you spent at home, and then suddenly you’re craving it again.

It’s a bell curve, pretty much. (Bell curve courtesy of Economics Help.)

And now I realize this sounds like I’m talking about middle age, but I’m not. I’m not there yet. This is something else, so similar yet so different.

This is growing up.

Some hit that line sooner than others, by sheer will or circumstances out of their control.

And then there’s me.

It’s not an issue of maturity vs. immaturity–I get that. But priorities and comfort and contentment.  It’s what stimulates you and where you find your heart taking you.

I’m still figuring it all out. I tend to over-think things (when I’m not making rash decisions, that is).

It’s that point where going out becomes sad rather than fun (I’m not there).

It’s that point where renting gives way to home ownership (I’m not there).

It’s that point where running a mile becomes a chore (I’m there).

It’s that point where you learn to pick your battles (I’m getting there).

And maybe it’s not so much a single point but a set of points that together form a line and maybe that line isn’t a straight line and maybe that line doesn’t fall in the same place for every person. I’m getting that.

But the line is there and someday I’ll know I’ve passed it (be it by swimming, by air, by digging, by walking, or by closing my eyes and running as fast as I can through it).

* * *

This post was written as a Just Write exercise. A good challenge to get the rust off and find my creativity once more. Bear with me while I attempt to find it!

Check out others’  Just Write posts here.

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4 thoughts on “The Line.

  1. Sara Martin says:

    Great post! I can identify with the feeling you’re about to cross a threshold. The funny thing is, when I was younger, I assumed there weren’t very many thresholds in life. But every year older I get, I realize there are thousands. As many as I want. Some are crossed intentionally, when I desire change. Others are like what you’re describing — slow transition into unknown waters. And one day you look back and think, “Whoa, what just happened?” Good luck!

  2. CultFit says:

    Very well written and thoroughly enjoyable. I could play the “I’m older card” but I won’t it’s cliched and tired (I’m late 30’s). I’ll just opine that what you are describing is life in it’s purest form.
    Enjoy each and every second. Don’t lament about the past or get bogged down in trivial matters of the present.

  3. adangross says:

    Thanks! I’m staring down 30 this spring so I’m sure there’ll be more thoughts like this swimming around my head, whether I want them there or not!

  4. Stephanie says:

    I absolutely love this.


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