Flashback Friday

This week in the past: Emo crap, making out with strangers, bachelorette party, and vindication.

April 4th, 2002 | Age: 19 | Music: Dashboard Confessional:  Again I Go Unnoticed

for some reason i just feel like such emotional crap. i really don’t know. i’m going for a walk in the woods with my guitar. maybe we’ll see. i hate my emotions some time. i hate not having control over what i feel. hopefully i’ll be back in the morning.

* * *

April 5th, 2003 | Age: 20 | Music: None

some quotes of the evening:

him:”i’ve wanted to kiss you for a long time.”
me:”that’s cool.”

him:”yeah, see those lightbulbs? my parents own the company that makes them.”

* * *

April 4th, 2004 | Age: 21 | Music: None

OBVIOUSLY the above song lyric does not apply to this day and age, as no men at the bars had condoms on them!!!

Bridget’s bachelorette party was FUN AS HELL…mad props to brook and mary for the organization!

Highlights of the night:

+Christine changing “Come to Yogi’s for Final Four Action!” on chalkboard to “COME TO YOGI’S FOR FINAL FUCK ACTION”…”umm i think somebody wrote fuck on your board you might want to check it out”

+going every where with a 3 foot inflated penis and bridget decorated in panties.

+beating up a guy at kilroy’s on kirkwood after he pushed christine. I told him she had cancer and this was her last night before starting chemo on monday (LIE) and he said he didn’t fucking care so Linda and I each punched him a few times.

+that dude buying us all like $50 in shots.

+me shooting down the guy who said i looked like a tasty candy cane and he wanted to lick me. christmas is OVER.

+one word: BULLWINKELS!

+the scene christine created at Denny’s!

There is probably a lot more but I am at work.


* * *

April 4th, 2005 | Age: 22 | Music: None

In highschool, I had this boyfriend. I noticed he had a problem with drinking. I, at the time, did not drink. It wasn’t just the fact that he drank that bothered me, but that he seemed to lack any control over his drinking. I don’t think he understood that my problem was based on his lack of control rather than just the fact that he drank.

It has recently come to my attention that said boyfriend is now in rehab/detox for alcoholism. Chances are, he drinks no more than a typical 22 yr old. But…he has entered into this program. To my knowledge, it is a Christian-based program.

His dad is a recovering alcoholic with anger issues. His oldest brother had alcohol issues. His older brother knows how to use alcohol without losing control and tried his best to keep his brothers in order, warning them that “they would turn up just like dad.”

His dad scared the hell out of me.

It is just good to look back and realize that I was not out of line when I told him he would be an alcoholic by the time he was 21 (so, i was a year off). I wasn’t out of line when I said alcohol could ruin his life and he needed to get help.

If I was a huge bitch, I would call and say “told you so.” But I’m not, and I won’t. It takes a lot of balls to get help. Lord knows I lack the balls to admit that I had a problem if I were to have one. Yeah, I probably have a small problem but I keep it under control. It’s the lack of control that causes the problems.

Now, what will more than likely happen is that he will develop a “holier than thou” attitude after becoming “cleansed” and look down on those with “problems” as being above them. I am saying this because of what I have read in his profiles about his detox. About the “Christian aspects” and how high of a position it will put him in.

He wants to be a cop.

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